Understanding Women: Learn the Secrets of How Women Think

• Do you want to learn the secrets of understanding women?

• Would you like to know how women think?

• Understanding girls and women is challenging, but you can do it ...

• And it will benefit you greatly, but it turns out you don't have to!

• Intrigued? Get some great self improvement advice in love relationship

Tips & Tricks for Men on Understanding Girls & Women

(Note: This self improvement article is mostly aimed at men, but women can take a peek as well, of course ... If you are a woman it might be fun to see if you think I 'get' your sex or not). :-)

As a young boy you are probably pretty perplexed when it comes to understanding girls. Then you grow up into a man who is more than likely even more perplexed about understanding women.

There are a lot of things that men are naturally equipped to handle in this world, but apparently knowing how to understand women is not on that list ...

You would think after all these years of evolution and human development there would be a greater sense of how women think built into every man's mind at birth, but no, no, understanding girls remains a mystery!

It might almost seem that nature wants the female to be surrounded by mystery and intrigue, which means boys have to continue the struggle of understanding girls and later on in life understanding women. There are ways to deal with this, though.

Now, understanding women and how women think is a fascinating subject, and I am going to do my very best communicating it to you, so this particular personal development article is going to be pretty long and involved.

If you just want to skip down to the single most important point and the summary you can (but you'll miss some very important info). Use this link to jump: Using True Love for Understanding Women. Or, even better, just read on and get some great self improvement advice in love relationship - and more. You CAN learn how to understand women!

Learning How to Understand Women?

Even if you wear your sexual, reproductive equipment on the outside of your body there are ways you can learn how to understand women.

Now, if you are brave and particularly interested in personal development and self improvement, you can do what I, personally, have done: Get in touch with and integrate your feminine aspects.

I heartily recommend doing this. It provides for a much greater feeling of wholeness and integrity, as well as giving you a more direct first hand experience of how women think and feel.

And no, allowing yourself to experience and integrate your feminine sides does not make you gay (homosexual). You will be as masculine as ever, and ... odds are that many women will be even more attracted to you. At least this has been my experience. I now know much more about how women thing and have an extremely easy time with women.

(Maybe, someday, I will write about the processes that I have been through in this area - but not here and now, because this is about you and understanding women, not about me).

On the other hand, you don't need to do what I have done. The good news is you can learn how to understand women if you give it just a bit of effort, time and thought.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - Beginning of Sidebars - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Now, before I go on with this self improvement article on understanding women, I feel the need to answer three questions that I sometimes get. I will use three quick sidebars for those.

Sidebar 1:


Is Understanding Women Something I Can Teach You Personally?

Sometimes I get this question from men: Can you teach me what you have? Can you teach me (1-on-1 or together with my partner) how to understand women?

And my answer is: yes I can.

I do take on private clients for online life coaching via email, telephone and Skype / Gmail Video Chat, and I have successfully taught men about understanding women & how women think - and about how to get in touch with - and accept - their feminine sides.

Fair warning, though: It can be quite a challenging and time consuming process! (But so, so beneficial).


Sidebar 2:


Is Understanding MEN Something I Can Teach Women?

Yes. I have done so many times, both 1-on-1, 1-on-2 with couples, and 1-on-many in talks and lectures. Seeing as how I have connected with and integrated my feminine sides while still remaining very much a man, I am told that I am quite good at this.


Sidebar 3:


Do I Coach and Teach Men, Women & Couples on Sexuality, Too?

Yes, I do.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - End of Sidebars - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

What do Women Want?

I wish I could tell you that women want the same things that men want, but we all know that is not true. Women do want the same basic life successes and joys that men strive after, but how women think of these things and define these things is quite different from most men. .

Of course, every man wants different things and it is the same for women. Yet, there are some basic things that everyone wants like happiness, inner peace, freedom, wholeness, acceptance, and true love. Understanding women is not a matter of learning that they want to be happy, at peace, free, whole, accepted, and loved, but of understanding what they think these things mean!

Knowing this is essential to understanding women

That's where the real difference is between men and women! Ask a woman what she wants out of life and you typically get answers like "I want to be happy." Most men leave it at that when in fact they should be asking exactly what happiness is to that particular woman.

So, here is your first lesson in how women think: they think in details.

General ideas like wanting to be happy may satisfy the male brain, but it isn't enough for a woman. She wants you to know what happiness would mean for her so you can fulfill that. Understanding girls requires you to be interested in the details without dropping the ball once she gives a very basic answer.

A Woman's Instinct and Intuition

If there is one thing women have fine tuned, even in the modern world, it is natural instinct, an intuition.

An example: If you have ever lived with a mother with small children in the home, you know what this instinct is like. There can be crying child down the hall one day and she completely ignores it while the next day she jumps from the bed and runs as if the cry that day is life threatening.

How does a mother know that the first cry was nothing to worry about and the second one required immediate attention? Well, she just does. It is natural. Intuitive. Instinctual.

That instinct carries over into relationships and all other aspects of a woman's life. This is where many men struggle with understanding women. Women will instinctively and intuitively pick up on small details and make assumptions and judgments and draw conclusions without saying a word. A lot of this information is at a gut level and most women are not even aware of it taking place most of the time.

Another Example of How Women Think

This instinct and intuition is why a man can go on a date and believe there was a real connection, only to find that the woman never wants to speak to him again. What went wrong?

In many cases, there was an instinctive sense in the woman that things weren't going to work, or that there was something "off" with the man. She may not even be able to explain it beyond that.

When information comes from a woman's instinct or intuition, it is difficult to put into words and explain. This is where the disconnect often comes between men and women, making understanding women a real challenge for men. Men simply can't understand what is unspoken but all so natural inside the female mind.

So, Is Understanding Women Impossible for a Man?

How do you know how women think ... if they themselves don't even know how they get the information that feeds their brains and guides their actions and decisions? Well, like I said, it's a challenge! :-) But it is doable.

If you want, you can learn to do the exact same thing they do, and then you will know. Like I said in the beginning, that takes some doing, some personal development, as you get in touch with your inherent femininity and intuition.

If you want to go down this road you can take courses, of course, but you might also simply ask a couple of trusted women to start teaching you. That's what I did. As a matter of fact I spent years doing that. And got pretty good at it, too.

I also worked specifically on strengthening my intuition - and learning to trust it. I now use my intuition extensively - not just for understanding women, but in everything I do.

However, if you're not really interested in that then probably the best thing you can do is accept the fact that the female mind works intuitively much of the time while the male mind works logically much of the time.

So - just stop expecting stringent logic and accept the difference. That will make understanding women - and your life - much easier.

Understanding Women's Unspoken Needs

One obstacle to understanding girls at a young age is figuring out their 'mind games' and why they want to play them.

Men tend to be straight forward most of the time. If they like a girl they are ready to make a connection and see where it leads. This is the same for young boys and adult men, but not necessarily so for women.

When they see what they consider an attractive woman, most men don't over think what may happen in the future, what could go wrong, or if it's a match made in heaven. They are simply intrigued into action.

Women function a bit differently. Interest in a man tends to be driven by a sense of his ability to meet her deep seated needs.

Understanding Women: Women Scrutinize Men - With a Purpose

Many women want men to pick up on their unspoken needs and send signals that they can handle them. In the woman's mind it is more like a test, but to men it comes off as game playing.

Men would prefer to be directly told "I need a strong man who can sense what I want, protect me, care for me, and take care of a family." If that were to come out of a woman's mouth the man could determine if he can meet those needs and either step up to the plate or back away.

Yet, women don't speak these deep seated needs out loud. They go the unspoken route of watching men in a variety of situations to see how they naturally respond.

This is another lesson in understanding women: they put you under a microscope. They are constantly collecting information about what you do or don't do and what that says about your ability to meet their needs.

Understanding Women: There Are No Rules, Only Intuition, Tests & Adaptation

The problem is many men spend way too much time MENTALLY and INTELLECTUALLY trying to determine what women want, what to say in different circumstances, and what a woman wants to see or hear.

Most of the time that won't work, because IT IS INFLEXIBLE and NOT ATTUNED to the woman in the changing circumstances of life!

So forget that. Just forget it. There ARE NO SET RULES! You CANNOT use your mind to figure out what goes on in a woman's instincts and her intuition.

You are much better of if you just acknowledge that not all of a woman's needs are going to be bluntly stated and that there are going to be tests that you don't even know you are taking. Which is okay. You don't need to worry about it.

Just be yourself and act out of sincerity and honesty. If you are the right man for a particular woman, she will use her intuition and instinct and all of those unspoken tests to pick up on that. This is an extremely important lesson in understanding women.

Understanding Women's Hearts

Here is one last tip on learning how to understand women: everything in a relationship is connected to the heart, to love and pure emotion.

As you are well aware, this is not necessarily the same for men.

This is why most men can have casual sexual relationships without feeling any true emotions for their sex partner.

Women struggle with this since they connect via their emotions and heart to most of their relationships - particularly their sexual relationships.

When your attempts at understanding women leave you scratching your head in complete confusion, it is likely because the woman in your life is not following common sense or logic which guides your own actions. She is likely following one of these things that you aren't as in tune with:

- Instinct
- Intuition
- Knowledge gathered through observation
- Love
- Raw emotion

In some cases a woman may be reacting from something you did in one odd moment without even realizing you were being observed. Or, she may be responding from a gut level instinct that something is off in the relationship or with you in particular. Finally, there may be something emotional going on that she hasn't felt comfortable revealing to you yet.

In other words: understanding women is complicated because they have different levels of information than you have. If you can LOVE, however, you are going to be all right.

When it comes to understanding women love is the main key.

The ability to communicate (incl. talk about your feelings) that so many women say they desire (and they do!) is actually secondary. When it comes right down to it, your ability to feel and express true love (perhaps even just wordlessly) is what counts for most women. (We'll get back to that).

The Benefits of Instinct and Intuition

While intuition, instinct and emotion make understanding women difficult for most men, it also has a benefit to men. Many women can pick up when a man is struggling with something internally, is stressed out, or when there are emotional shifts, or shifts in the relationship.

This is why women will start to ask questions about how you are feeling or what you are thinking even when you believe nothing is wrong. They sometimes pick up on it before you yourself do! There may very well be something going on that you aren't mentally and logically aware of just yet. If you will just let her, your woman will help you become aware of it.

If, on top of being able to feel and express love, you are able to be open and honest with your thoughts and feelings, you can actually benefit immensely - while at the same time making your relationship much stronger.

So do communicate to the best of your ability - and take advantage of the female intuition that so many women themselves are benefitting form in their personal lives.

How Women Think: Emotions & Love = Logic

Finally, understanding women will be a lot easier if you start giving more credit to emotions, particularly love.

Many men are uncomfortable with emotion so they value it far less than intellectual reasoning and logic.

If understanding women is your goal, you will have to learn that emotion IS logic for many women.

If you can tap into what emotions they may be experiencing, you will be more successful figuring out the proper way to respond. This will require you to push beyond basic logic much of the time and the best way to do that is ... yes, you've guessed it: to feel love.

Using True Love for Understanding Women

When you feel true love (where you love for the sake of loving, as opposed to needy love, where you love because the other person fulfills your needs) towards another person you automatically get in touch with that person. Love is the perfect medium for communication, even without words.

Feel true love, and you will KNOW what is going on and what to do.

Feeling true love IS understanding women!

How to experience true love? By letting go of any and all needs you have that are connected to your partner. Accept that even if she does happen to fulfill some of your needs, she certainly doesn't have to, and you don't NEEED her to.

If you can do that, if you can feel (and show) true love, even wordlessly, you've got it made, pretty much. :-)

SUMMARY of Understanding Women: Figuring It All out

Okay, so you have learned that understanding girls is difficult for very good reasons. Now how do you put it all together and start figuring out how women think?

Well, by now, hopefully you are aware that you don't have to!

Women don't think the same way you do, but in fact that doesn't matter all that much.

All you really have to do is be openly, honestly and lovingly yourself.

But, this has been a long and involved self improvement article, so just to recap and round it all up, here's a summary with a few extra, final additions:

Women Think in Details
This is important because you, as a man, probably think more in general terms. Those will not satisfy a woman. She wants it up close and personal! Whereas you may tend to judge quite a few things in, say, three general levels (good, neutral, and not good) women have many, many more levels for just about everything in life ... and they change all the time!


Intuition, Grey Zones and Changing Circumstances
You can start understanding women more by simply remembering that they may be operating off of information that is difficult to put into words. Everything may be black and white in your mind, but her mind has lots of gray. Situations in life vary all the time, and many women are in sync with that - which means that they do not follow set rules but are constantly being flexibly attuned to circumstances.


You Could Choose to Integrate Your Feminine Aspects
This is often a long, challenging but also very giving process with absolutely no downsides. And the women? They will love you for it!

Understanding Women's Unspoken Needs
While women generally tend to communicate a lot and in much more detail than men, there is one very important area where they tend to stay quiet and evaluate instead: Judging the man's ability to satisfy whatever needs they have. Don't let this worry you too much. Just pay loving attention to the woman and be yourself.

Being Openly and Honestly Yourself - and as Communicative as You Can
Well, this headline speaks for itself. No further comments necessary.


Detailed Analysis - You Can Do It, Too
Another thing you can do to start understanding women right now is start to do the unspoken analysis and observation that you now know women perform. Pay more attention to the small things she does, the things she says or doesn't say, and question what it means about her and what needs it could be pointing towards.


Get Help from Women for Understanding Women
This headline speaks pretty much for itself, too.


Don't Try to Learn All the Female Rules
Because when it comes right down to it ... there aren't any! So drop your mind in this respect and just be honest and sincere.


Benefit from the Female Instinct and Intuition
Since women tend to notice your problems, your stress and any shifts that take place inside you, perhaps even before you yourself do, then you might as well benefit from it by answering their questions about how you feel, etc. and listening to what they have to say in those areas. After all, it's totally free, and the women will love you for it.


Accept That Emotions, Particularly Love, Equal Logic
Most women are much more driven by emotions than most men. Accept it, and remember that the emotion of love is the ultimate trump. Feel and show love, and you've pretty much got it made.


Feeling true love IS understanding women!
Love is the perfect communication's medium and when you feel true love (as opposed to needy love) you KNOW all you need to know!


In short: Understanding girls and women may be a challenge, but it is not impossible. You can do it!

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