Absolute Reality Revealed (Non Duality): Just STOP Creating Your Own Reality

• Absolute reality revealed!
• The reality of enlightened spirituality and non duality is yours!
• And with it: happiness, wholeness, love, freedom & inner peace!
• All you have to do is STOP creating your own reality!
• Read on to uncover reality with the Personal Development Guy

Definition of Reality

The dictionary defines reality as: ’Real existence; that which underlies appearance; something which is actually experienced’.

So this definition equates reality with experience (reality = experience), which is a pretty simple, practical and useful way of defining what is real. To be real something has to be experienced.

Also, it follows that if something is actually experienced it is real! (So if you experience something, it is real - at least for you).

So, the question that arises is which kind of experience do you want? Your answer determines which kind of reality you should choose to experience. Because the type of reality you choose and your experience are in fact one and the same. Curious? Good! To see your choices, just read on ...

What Is Reality?
- Absolute Reality vs Personal, Relative Reality

The definition that experience = reality pretty much works for me. I do need to clarify something, though: We humans can experience our reality in three ways:

a) Absolute reality ... the experience of yourself and life as-is (as a unified whole)

b) Relative (personal) reality ... the experience of yourself and life through the ego ... this is a subset of absolute reality

c) Consensus reality ... what a culture, a sub-culture or a group agree upon as real (that is... this is another subset of absolute reality

While there is only one absolute reality, there are billions of relative (personal) realities on the planet today, since each human being (above a certain age) has his or her own. Absolute reality CONTAINS all these relative/personal realities ... they exist INSIDE absolute reality.

If from this you get the impression that relative/personal reality is somehow LESS REAL than absolute reality, you are absolutely right.

What Is Reality?
- Absolute Reality vs Personal, Relative Reality

Both personal, relative reality and the aggregated consensus reality are constructs. Machinations. Fictions, if you like. As in: they're not absolutely real.

Personal, relative reality and consensus reality are real, but only relatively speaking, not in an absolute sense. What this means is that they are real for some people, and not real for other people.

And since both relative, personal reality is characterized by fear, lack and loneliness, the experience of those realities will be: not so great.

Isn't there an alternative kind of reality that is the same not matter who you are and no matter which culture you're from? Perhaps a NICER alternative? Yes: absolute reality.

Absolute reality is the only reality that is common to ALL human beings, regardless of culture, gender, race and age.

Also, the experience of absolute reality is rather nice.

Personal, Relative Reality vs Consensus Reality vs Absolute Reality

To sum up ... There are three basic kinds of reality:

• Personal, relative reality - which is your individual world view
• Consensus reality - which is an aggregation of common world views in your culture
• Absolute reality - which is the reality that contains ALL kinds of reality


Personal, relative reality can be fun because this is where you can create your very own reality. However, it usually isn't fun because most of the time is done unconsciously - based on fear, lack and separation, which makes it terribly unpleasant - depressing and lonely. Personal, relative reality is where most people in this day and age live, though, which is kind of sad.

Consensus reality
is what the majority in your particular culture (or: subculture) agree upon as real. It is created in a kind of unconscious large scale negotiation. Since most people live in their own, separate, lonely, relative, personal reality, the typical consensus reality is the same way, oftentimes even more so, because consensus reality is based on the lowest common denominator (fear, separation and lack). Which is also kind of sad.

Absolute reality
is the one you will be interested in if you are into personal development, self improvement and spiritual growth. Why? Because it is in absolute reality that you find a lasting sense of freedom, wholeness, happiness, wonder, love and inner peace. Other words used to describe absolute reality include: Silence, spaciousness, presence, I AM, being here now, oneness, connecting with Source or God, the transpersonal realm, transcendence, and Home (with a capital H). The experience of absolute reality is what the yogis and the various spiritual teachers are talking about when they speak of 'spiritual enlightenment'. It's what enlightened spirituality is all about.

By now it should be pretty obvious that absolute reality is the reality to go for.

Interested? Then please read on.

You Have Already Experienced Absolute Reality

There is nothing strange, exotic or unattainable about absolute reality. Odds are that you have already experienced it - probably even many times. You just were not aware that that's what it was.

So please think back, now.


Find an absolutely incredible moment in your life. One that took your breath away and left you speechless. A moment when all you did was to BE THERE, completely present, completely experiencing whatever it was. Perhaps you were skiing or skating or mountain climbing or doing some other sport or craft, maybe, when you were totally 'in the zone'; or in nature; or in meditation or on an inner journey; or experiencing an exquisite work of art; or in the embrace of a loved one (it could even be an orgasm)?

In that very moment there what were your thoughts? There weren't any. Well, what were your beliefs, then? There weren't any beliefs, either. Because as soon as you start thinking or believing again, the moment passes.

Okay, in that particular, breathless moment what were your negative, unpleasant feelings? No, there weren't any of those, either. Feelings were present, though, it was just that they were all pleasant ones: Silence, presence, spaciousness, joy, awe, wonder, love, happiness, freedom, inner peace, and so on.

I am sure you have experienced a moment like that. In fact, I am sure you have experienced many moments just like that.

In those particular moments you were experiencing absolute reality.

How to Move from Relative Reality to Absolute Reality

If you have decided that you want to try absolute reality out yourself, congratulations! Your have made an excellent choice. One that has the potential to change your life for the better.

There are many routes, theories, traditions and methods, which will take you to absolute reality.

Eastern philosophies and some Western ones, too, attempt to help you with it. Yoga, meditation and tantric sex are more or less designed for this purpose.

Some modern techniques for healing and psychotherapy may (more or less accidentally) have the same effect.

There are also a few organized religions (like some versions of Buddhism, Daoism and Hinduism) which focus on it, and many of the mystical traditions of other organized religions do the same (e.g. Christian and Islamic mysticism).

The common denominator for all of the above is, however, that they usually do not lead to quick results. They may work, but it takes a long time (years or even decades) plus a lot of dedication and discipline.

I recommend a much simpler and more direct avenue. It goes like this ...

The Personal Development Guy's Recommended 5 Steps Home to Absolute Reality

1) Get a 'map' (an understanding) of the 'territory' you are about to enter.

Learn what reality is (by studying this page and at the very least also What Is Reality), get very clear on your identity, who you really are, what life is and what the connections are.

To do that you might want to check out transpersonal psychology (Wikipedia link), the Enneagram, other pages on this website (particularly my empowerment theory) - and my ebooks, too (perhaps in this case particularly How to Be Yourself and Find Authentic Happiness).


2) Check your wallet and, more importantly, your will.


Do you REALLY want this, and are you willing to do / pay what ever it takes? Not just in terms of money, because it really doesn't have to cost you anything, financially, but in terms of change. Most people resent change. You, too? Well, if you are currently living in the world of the ego (relative reality and consensus reality), you'll need to change. It'll cost you the (fear, lack and loneliness based) status quo - most notably some of your convictions / beliefs. (But it's good riddance, I promise you!)


3) Choose a 'vehicle' (for personal development and change) and learn how to 'drive' it (use it).


The 'vehicle' might be something like The Journey by Brandon Bays (a mostly emotional process); multi-incarnational sessions by Chris Griscom; The Work by Byron Katie (a mostly mental process); author and teacher Bruce Moens teachings; Holothropic Breathwork by Stanislav Grof (general and non-directed / non-focused in nature); or my own the Let Go Method. Your 'vehicle' could also be yoga, meditation, tantric sex or any other method you prefer.


4) Examine and consciously suspend or let go of your most limiting 'filters' - i.e. your beliefs regarding absolute reality, the soul, the ego, love, happiness, consciousness and life itself.

Often, this is a necessary step, because an awful lot of people have an awful lot of internal 'filters' or 'blinders' regarding those vital elements of life. If you don't know those 'blinders' are there, they may very well stop you from experiencing what you need to experience.

If, on the other hand, you do know what they are, you can choose to temporarily suspend them while you work with your 'vehicle' of choice - or even choose to let them go completely. In general my recommendation would be to let go of as many of your 'filters' (limiting beliefs) as you can. Or at least change them to make them as non-limiting as you can.


5) Go Home to absolute reality again and again.


No matter which 'vehicle' you are using, use it again and again with the explicit purpose of going Home to absolute reality. At first it does not matter if you go Home for only a brief moment like a second or two. Later, you can work on expanding your experience.

If your chosen method is one of letting go, then you can let each of your experiences of unpleasantness (pain, fear, etc.) guide you as 'road signs' Home AND use them as fuel for your journey Home to absolute reality. If this is your choice I would recommend buying and reading my ebook Finding Inner Peace by Letting Go.

And remember: Practice makes the master, so if you truly want to make your permanent experiential home in absolute reality, you will probably need to make the trip many times. The good news is that once you have made a permanent move in a specific area of your life (love, relationships, work, money, etc.) you do not need to do it again ... and there are only so many areas of life, so at some point you will probably be living in absolute reality most of the time. This is true for myself, and for some of my clients, too.

More Suggestions on How to Proceed on the Way Home to Absolute Reality

People often ask me for exact instructions on how to experience absolute reality, and I really want to help, but the fact is that we are all different, so what works for some folks may not work for others. You will probably need to try out different things for yourself. Having a playful, open and inquisitive attitude helps a lot.

Towards the end what has already become a long self improvement article I would like to expand and add to the above 5 points. In general, I would recommend that you try out things like these (and perhaps finding a combination of some of them that works for you):

- focus on wholeness (non duality - seeing yourself and life as a unified whole) and on understanding who you are (e.g. learning these things as they are presented on this website) - this is point 1) above, 'Get a map'. The important point here is that you can choose to focus your efforts primarily on things that teach you to see everything as a unified whole (which it is).

- determining whether your ego has a focus on a) the physical body/instincts, or b) emotions/feelings, or c) intellect/mental capacity, and adjusting your personal development accordingly (undoubtedly you already know the answer to this - if not, the Enneagram may help you, see below).

- learning to understand and use the Enneagram to determine which of the nine basic types of ego you are blessed with ... and how to deal with that. Used right the Enneagram is a method focused on getting you to move BEYOND your ego. The Enneagram teaches you to put your ego in a box (categorize it) order to help you get OUT of that box. Used like that the Enneagram becomes a tool for personal and spiritual development.

- reading the book: 'The Future of Psychology' by Stanislav Grof as a way to add a pinch of transpersonal psychology. You might also choose to read the later books by Abraham Maslow - and perhaps Carl Rogers, Carl Jung, Charles Tart, Ken Wilber and Roberto Assagioli as well. In most respects, though, the above mentioned book by Stanislav Grof will tell you what you need to know.

- doing energetic, physical training (like tai chi, yoga or chi gong).

- minding your body and physical health (e.g. by eating sensibly and indulging yourself by staying in reasonable shape and going to some sort of healing and/or wellness, like perhaps massage, healing, chranio sacral therapy or whatever you prefer). What you eat has a surprisingly powerful effect on many areas of your life.

- minding your mental and spiritual health (e.g. by doing personal development and keeping a personal development journal and/or seeing/talking/writing with a teacher or a coach or a guide in consciousness. If you are interested I occasionally take on this role (of coach/guide) for an international audience myself. If you sign up for my newsletter (opt in box below the navigation buttons on the top left + at the bottom of this page) you will see when + get a rebate).

- learning to still your mind at will so you do not have to listen to it incessantly chatting away like a paranoid parrot (meditation is supposed to help you do this, but that never worked for me. Instead I have had some training with brainwave entrainment (neurofeedback), which is learning to control your brainwaves by will, using some very sensitive equipment and a computer. That worked for me ... I can now enter a meditative state where my brain is running on alpha waves in a matter of seconds. And the time it took to learn this could be measured in weeks rather than years, so it was much faster to learn than learning traditional meditation.

- learning one or more techniques for letting go (e.g. my own the Let Go Method, most notably described in my ebook Finding Inner Peace by Letting Go)

- doing inner journeys (as mentioned in point 3) above). You never know where this is going to take you, but you can be pretty darn sure that it is going to be interesting - and most likely educational and healing, too.

- learning to understand and take responsibility for fulfilling your own needs

- choosing to take responsibility for your entire life experience

Absolute Reality and YOU: Final Words

This self improvement article has ended up being longer than most here on personaldevelopmentguy.com. That's because absolute reality is an extremely important subject for all who are interested in enlightened spirituality, personal development and self growth.

If that's you I recommend that you study this page in depth, pick out whatever you feel ready for and start acting on it!

If it seems overwhelming please just remember that baby steps will get you where you want to go, too. :-)

 



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